I appropriately titled this entry because...well, I love that show...and here lately that's just what it has been: us. Me and the kids. Jake got his job back in the oilfield...well, not the same job he lost this last time but the one he was laid off from the day we picked up the kids in April of 2015. (yeah that was scary) So, he is gone for weeks at a time. The first hitch was just a little over 2 weeks. The next one was 3 and this one will be 5. It won't always be this way, but unemployment took it's toll on our savings and credit cards so he is working extra to get us back in a good place financially. Needless to say, we utilize FaceTime a LOT.
My Nanny has been my saving grace. Were it not for her, I would be up a creek. She helps me so much and she just doesn't even have to do anything but be here and it's helpful. My mother in law and father in law are always willing to help...and my dad has picked Riley up from school a time or two when I needed it. But, for the most part, I make sure my kids come first so that doesn't have to happen. Riley landed the best teacher in Pine Tree Primary. I am SO incredibly thankful that God answered my many many nights of prayer and gave Riley the perfect teacher for his needs. Riley has a form of dyslexia and most don't even recognize it until 1st grade...when they're already so far behind. I knew something wasn't right with him but everyone kept telling me to relax and that I was just paranoid. BULL. Anyway, she referred me to Dr Childress who is a brilliant Opthamologist in Longview. He specializes in visual therapy and is helping Riley so much. He said that with his hard work and our cooperation at home, Riley will be reading above his grade level before the end of the year. I pray he is right. I see my poor baby struggling and it hurts this mama's heart. We pray for Jesus to heal his eyes every night before we go to sleep. He has the most tender heart and I couldn't ask for a sweeter son. He is so kind and so full of joy. He never doesn't have a smile on his face. He even smiles when he sleeps! Precious boy, I love him so.
Little miss Ramsey Mae has become the sassiest little thing I've ever seen. She has her hand on her hip 99% of the time when she talks to you and she never ever stops talking. I honestly don't know when she breathes. She refuses to potty train because she says that she is the baby and babies wear diapers. (insert eye roll) I'm trying to convince her this is not the case that all three of them will ALWAYS be my babies...and over the past couple of days she has seemed more and more interested in the potty so fingers crossed we are almost over that hump lol.
Roxi Kay is such a sweet little girl. She is ornery as the day is long but she has the sweetest little "yes ma'am" I've ever heard and I can't help but just stare at her with wonder. Her hair is getting long and she is starting to recognize letters and numbers. She is interested in the days of the week right now and what order they go in. I am so in awe of how children pick up on things when you never even realize they're listening.
In one week we will celebrate our "gotcha day" anniversary. It's already been a year! My babies have been the biggest blessings in my life and I thank God for giving them to me. One thing I was recently told is that God gave these children to me to love and to protect and to care for no matter what. THEY are my obligation and my privilege. I take pride in knowing that He entrusted me with such a big job and I will lay down my life to fulfill that purpose.
Thank you all for your continued prayers.
We love you
Lori
Saturday, January 14, 2017
Sunday, June 26, 2016
Time flies when you're having fun!
It's hard to believe that it has already been 5 months since the State of Texas finally legalized our sweet little family. Time flies! We have had a busy Spring and now Summer. It has been wild and fun and tiring and exhilarating and I'm sure dozens of other words I can't even think of right now. But to just put it in one word it has been surreal.
Sometimes I still catch myself looking at these little people in the back of my suv and thinking "I can't believe they're mine!" But, they are and I'm so very thankful they are!
We have been working on remodeling our home. Riley now has a new room and a bigger closet than me (that's gonna change lol) And I have a much nicer, much more functional kitchen. AND A PANTRY!!! haha It's the little things, right? I don't know what in the world I would do without it I promise you that. It doesn't take long to fill it up and then empty it again when you're feeding 5 people! I should be used to that...this is exactly the size family I grew up in with the same amount of boys and girls. Except, my parents had a break between their two girls...a 5 year break. We have 13 months! So, I'm sure that teenage years will require lots of prayer and probably lots of medication for me. lol! They are sweet littles but I know that the time will come when I won't be their favorite person and that's okay because it will mean I'm doing something right. Then, once again they will love me as they get older and realize I'm not as dumb as they thought. I know this because...well, my parents are a lot smarter than they were when I was in high school ;)
We are getting ready for Riley to start school this Fall. Well, I'm trying to get ready. Because I know it is going to take a whole lot of preparation for me to let my little boy go to school. I have tears streaming down my cheeks now just thinking about it. Most people have 5 years to prepare for this. I didn't....so yeah, it's gonna be tough. But, I'm going to put my brave mommy mask on for him that day and we will make it just fine.
Ramsey is turning into a little mess. She has all these little sayings she has picked up from different people in our family that she will spit out and it always cracks me up. I don't know what to say when she looks at me with her hand on her hip and says, "Mama, I think we have a probwem." lol Then when I do laugh she says "Mommy it is NOT a JOKE!" My word I don't know where she comes up with this stuff. She is so funny and such a mess.
Roxi is full of sass and is very much a middle child. She doesn't like anyone else getting more attention than her. Needless to say, she's well aquainted with the time out corner because of that one. She loves all things pink but she loves to play rough and rowdy too. I am planning on signing her up for gymnastics this Fall. She will enjoy that and I think she is built for it. She loves to snuggle with her mommy and she is a daddy's girl through and through. That makes my heart happy. I used to tell Jacob that I hoped we had a girl some day so that he could understand the bond that a father and a daughter have. There's nothing like it. I couldn't ever make him understand how much I loved my daddy and how I've always felt like if he was behind me I could conquer the world. Now he knows...he sees it in her eyes. And so do I. It's precious and it fills me up to overflowing with love and gratitude.
God is just so so good.
Jacob was laid off from his job and it was pretty earth shattering. But, I'm not afraid. I know we will be okay. The scripture says do not be afraid over 300 times. I think I'll listen to that. It has never lead me wrong. So, we are waiting on God to show us what's next. One thing we've learned throughout our 6 years together is that we don't really need to make plans...we just need to trust Him. Lord knows, I KNOW that. But it's not always easy to just accept that. I'm reminded daily, though, that I'm not in control of anything and to just sit down and shut up. ;) I'll try, Lord. I promise I'll try.
Riley played tball in the spring. That was fun and exhausting at the same time. I'm too competitive to have a half-in coach. So, next year will be different. I know who's team I don't want him on. It's not about winning, although that is always a bonus. But, this is where they learn the fundamentals. And, when you don't have practices, the boys don't learn what it means to be disciplined and to work together as a team. They just show up for games and run around like a bunch of chickens with their heads cut off. It's just plain crazy and I'm not wired to sit by and just be okay with that. haha! I don't like "participation trophies" My brother grew up working his butt off playing ball and they knew that they better or there would be no trophy. And, believe me, none of the three of us (me or the twins) wanted any part of any kind of ribbons unless they were blue. You're either first or you lost. That's it Nothing in between lol. Riley blood....it runs deep.
We are going on a little trip in a couple of weeks and I just feel like a kid waiting for Christmas to get here. I cannot wait! We are going to see my childhood friends and stay with them for a few days and I am so flippin excited! This morning I woke myself up crying this morning...I had the most vivid dream and it was awful and I just couldn't shake it. My mom and sister and the boys are down there right now so I called her and she assured me everything was okay. I hate dreams like that. It's left me shaken up all day. Not sure why those kind of dreams happen but they are NOT COOL.
We are slowly trying to get this house back in order and still work on it at the same time. I have half of our fireplace painted and 3/4 of the kitchen floor done. lol This week we are going to finish all of the half done projects. That's my goal. Finish shiplap,Finish Fireplace. Finish floor. Finish garage, Finish kids bath. Then we can start the next 3 projects....girls rooms and the living room. :) Fun stuff.
I hope you all have a wonderful Summer. I'll be back sooner than later hopefully.
Until then, I'll just be busy being a mommy :)
And loving every minute of it.
Love,
Lori
Sometimes I still catch myself looking at these little people in the back of my suv and thinking "I can't believe they're mine!" But, they are and I'm so very thankful they are!
We have been working on remodeling our home. Riley now has a new room and a bigger closet than me (that's gonna change lol) And I have a much nicer, much more functional kitchen. AND A PANTRY!!! haha It's the little things, right? I don't know what in the world I would do without it I promise you that. It doesn't take long to fill it up and then empty it again when you're feeding 5 people! I should be used to that...this is exactly the size family I grew up in with the same amount of boys and girls. Except, my parents had a break between their two girls...a 5 year break. We have 13 months! So, I'm sure that teenage years will require lots of prayer and probably lots of medication for me. lol! They are sweet littles but I know that the time will come when I won't be their favorite person and that's okay because it will mean I'm doing something right. Then, once again they will love me as they get older and realize I'm not as dumb as they thought. I know this because...well, my parents are a lot smarter than they were when I was in high school ;)
We are getting ready for Riley to start school this Fall. Well, I'm trying to get ready. Because I know it is going to take a whole lot of preparation for me to let my little boy go to school. I have tears streaming down my cheeks now just thinking about it. Most people have 5 years to prepare for this. I didn't....so yeah, it's gonna be tough. But, I'm going to put my brave mommy mask on for him that day and we will make it just fine.
Ramsey is turning into a little mess. She has all these little sayings she has picked up from different people in our family that she will spit out and it always cracks me up. I don't know what to say when she looks at me with her hand on her hip and says, "Mama, I think we have a probwem." lol Then when I do laugh she says "Mommy it is NOT a JOKE!" My word I don't know where she comes up with this stuff. She is so funny and such a mess.
Roxi is full of sass and is very much a middle child. She doesn't like anyone else getting more attention than her. Needless to say, she's well aquainted with the time out corner because of that one. She loves all things pink but she loves to play rough and rowdy too. I am planning on signing her up for gymnastics this Fall. She will enjoy that and I think she is built for it. She loves to snuggle with her mommy and she is a daddy's girl through and through. That makes my heart happy. I used to tell Jacob that I hoped we had a girl some day so that he could understand the bond that a father and a daughter have. There's nothing like it. I couldn't ever make him understand how much I loved my daddy and how I've always felt like if he was behind me I could conquer the world. Now he knows...he sees it in her eyes. And so do I. It's precious and it fills me up to overflowing with love and gratitude.
God is just so so good.
Jacob was laid off from his job and it was pretty earth shattering. But, I'm not afraid. I know we will be okay. The scripture says do not be afraid over 300 times. I think I'll listen to that. It has never lead me wrong. So, we are waiting on God to show us what's next. One thing we've learned throughout our 6 years together is that we don't really need to make plans...we just need to trust Him. Lord knows, I KNOW that. But it's not always easy to just accept that. I'm reminded daily, though, that I'm not in control of anything and to just sit down and shut up. ;) I'll try, Lord. I promise I'll try.
Riley played tball in the spring. That was fun and exhausting at the same time. I'm too competitive to have a half-in coach. So, next year will be different. I know who's team I don't want him on. It's not about winning, although that is always a bonus. But, this is where they learn the fundamentals. And, when you don't have practices, the boys don't learn what it means to be disciplined and to work together as a team. They just show up for games and run around like a bunch of chickens with their heads cut off. It's just plain crazy and I'm not wired to sit by and just be okay with that. haha! I don't like "participation trophies" My brother grew up working his butt off playing ball and they knew that they better or there would be no trophy. And, believe me, none of the three of us (me or the twins) wanted any part of any kind of ribbons unless they were blue. You're either first or you lost. That's it Nothing in between lol. Riley blood....it runs deep.
We are going on a little trip in a couple of weeks and I just feel like a kid waiting for Christmas to get here. I cannot wait! We are going to see my childhood friends and stay with them for a few days and I am so flippin excited! This morning I woke myself up crying this morning...I had the most vivid dream and it was awful and I just couldn't shake it. My mom and sister and the boys are down there right now so I called her and she assured me everything was okay. I hate dreams like that. It's left me shaken up all day. Not sure why those kind of dreams happen but they are NOT COOL.
We are slowly trying to get this house back in order and still work on it at the same time. I have half of our fireplace painted and 3/4 of the kitchen floor done. lol This week we are going to finish all of the half done projects. That's my goal. Finish shiplap,Finish Fireplace. Finish floor. Finish garage, Finish kids bath. Then we can start the next 3 projects....girls rooms and the living room. :) Fun stuff.
I hope you all have a wonderful Summer. I'll be back sooner than later hopefully.
Until then, I'll just be busy being a mommy :)
And loving every minute of it.
Love,
Lori
Thursday, January 28, 2016
Psalm 113:9
I remember the day so very clearly so long ago sitting alone in my duplex, missing my husband, staring at the walls...listening to the fan spinning...silence was so very loud. I remember feeling like I just couldn't breathe. Like there was literally something physically keeping my chest from expanding enough to let air into my lungs. I grabbed my devotional and started reading it and then referred to the Bible verse at the end of it. Before I started in The Word, though, I bowed my head...actually, I knelt on my floor right there in my living room and asked God to please bring some peace into my heart. I felt like I was falling apart and I just needed....something. Anything...because NOTHING was filling this gaping hole in my heart and soul that longed to be filled with the sounds of little feet and being called Mommy.
I read the scripture listed but I kept reading...David usually always had something profound to speak of in the Book of Psalm and I just didn't want to stop. Then, I read the words. The words that I have clung to...that I have built my foundation on...the promise that my Heavenly Father gave me right there in my living room that very day, "He settles the barren woman in her home and makes her the happy mother of many children," Wow. I was only asking for one! Many!!??? Oh, Lord, surely that's not possible...not at my age.
Then a while later, I was convicted that I needed to stop asking and start acting. So we "prepared our tent" so to speak. We had two empty bedrooms...a big ol house with a big ol yard and just me and Jake to roam around. Sometimes I thought we were crazy to have bought this house. There's no way we would ever need all this room. It just isn't feasible. Time is ticking and still no baby...we won't ever fill this house up.
God said "Watch this."
January 21, 2016, The State of Texas declared that I am the legal and by all rights the same as the biological mother to my son, Riley Joseph, and my daughters, Roxi Kay and Ramsey Mae for all time.
He settles the barren woman in her home and makes her the HAPPY mother of many children.
Enlarge your house, build an addition. Spread out your home and spare no expense! Isaiah 54:2
For I know the plans that I have for you. Not to harm you but to give you hope for the future Jeremiah 29:11.
Amen.
There is not one second of my day that I don't feel thankful. Even when I am tired and need a shower and have a kid on each hip and another one hollering for whatever reason, I am thankful. I love like I've never loved before. These children have a piece of my heart that was never mine to keep and nobody else could ever have. I have no more emptiness. Just love. Jesus filled me up to overflowing and I just wish that there were words to describe the emotions I feel when I say those words. But there aren't. I look at these babies, MY babies and I literally can't believe He chose me. But oh Lord Praise His Name He DID choose me!
I won't even dare to pretend that every day is sunshine and roses. Parenting is hard. It's hard to have to say no and watch them cry because you have to discipline them. But, I always make sure they know that I love them. And I'm never angry with them. "We all make bad choices...that's part of growing up and learning. Mommy still makes bad choices...just like your learning to be a good girl/boy I'm learning to be a good mommy. We are in this together. We are a team. Never on opposing sides. I'll always be your biggest fan. You have made my life worth living. You have restored my faith. You have given me more joy than you will ever know. And I will love you for all of eternity. You are mine. And I am yours. Forever."
Once again, Jesus has won. Victory has been given.
In the words of Miss Clara on The War Room "Oooohhh Satan you just got your butt WHOOPED!"
Here are the answer to your many prayers...these are my babies,
<3 Lori, mommy of three on Earth and one in Heaven.
daughter of The King
wife to my Prince :)
I read the scripture listed but I kept reading...David usually always had something profound to speak of in the Book of Psalm and I just didn't want to stop. Then, I read the words. The words that I have clung to...that I have built my foundation on...the promise that my Heavenly Father gave me right there in my living room that very day, "He settles the barren woman in her home and makes her the happy mother of many children," Wow. I was only asking for one! Many!!??? Oh, Lord, surely that's not possible...not at my age.
Then a while later, I was convicted that I needed to stop asking and start acting. So we "prepared our tent" so to speak. We had two empty bedrooms...a big ol house with a big ol yard and just me and Jake to roam around. Sometimes I thought we were crazy to have bought this house. There's no way we would ever need all this room. It just isn't feasible. Time is ticking and still no baby...we won't ever fill this house up.
God said "Watch this."
January 21, 2016, The State of Texas declared that I am the legal and by all rights the same as the biological mother to my son, Riley Joseph, and my daughters, Roxi Kay and Ramsey Mae for all time.
He settles the barren woman in her home and makes her the HAPPY mother of many children.
Enlarge your house, build an addition. Spread out your home and spare no expense! Isaiah 54:2
For I know the plans that I have for you. Not to harm you but to give you hope for the future Jeremiah 29:11.
Amen.
There is not one second of my day that I don't feel thankful. Even when I am tired and need a shower and have a kid on each hip and another one hollering for whatever reason, I am thankful. I love like I've never loved before. These children have a piece of my heart that was never mine to keep and nobody else could ever have. I have no more emptiness. Just love. Jesus filled me up to overflowing and I just wish that there were words to describe the emotions I feel when I say those words. But there aren't. I look at these babies, MY babies and I literally can't believe He chose me. But oh Lord Praise His Name He DID choose me!
I won't even dare to pretend that every day is sunshine and roses. Parenting is hard. It's hard to have to say no and watch them cry because you have to discipline them. But, I always make sure they know that I love them. And I'm never angry with them. "We all make bad choices...that's part of growing up and learning. Mommy still makes bad choices...just like your learning to be a good girl/boy I'm learning to be a good mommy. We are in this together. We are a team. Never on opposing sides. I'll always be your biggest fan. You have made my life worth living. You have restored my faith. You have given me more joy than you will ever know. And I will love you for all of eternity. You are mine. And I am yours. Forever."
Once again, Jesus has won. Victory has been given.
In the words of Miss Clara on The War Room "Oooohhh Satan you just got your butt WHOOPED!"
Here are the answer to your many prayers...these are my babies,
<3 Lori, mommy of three on Earth and one in Heaven.
daughter of The King
wife to my Prince :)
Friday, August 28, 2015
McAdams: Party of FIVE?!?!?!?
Runny noses, doctor visits, poopy diapers, potty training, sippy cups, endless piles of laundry, Bubble Guppies, Hot Dog Hot Dog Hot Diggity Dog, Rockabye baby, tripping over toys, "WHERE ARE YOUR SHOES??!?" "LEAVE YOUR BOW ALONE!" No, you can't bring that turtle in the house. Ouch those cars are going to kill me if I step on them again. Mommy I need a bandaid....Is it bathtime yet? Can I play for a little while? Thank you for the bubbles! I love my new dress!
Mommy I wanna rock! I want my blankie. Cup!
"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine...Twinkle twinkle little star....Jesus loves me....Rockabye baby" Sweet Dreams Princess I love you
Mommy! Kiss me on the lips!
Mama do you mind if I watch a little TV? Mama, I love you. I just wanted to tell you that and give you a hug
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That's just a little synopsis of what one of my days look like now.
And I couldn't possibly be happier.
We have a 4 year old son, an almost 3 year old daughter and an almost 2 year old baby girl.
They are absolutely perfect in every possible way.
We sing, we dance, we sit in the corner sometimes...we laugh, we cry, but most of all....
WE LOVE.
"I love you Mama" never gets old.
Mommy I WUV YOU! Daddy I WUV YOU! You're my best Mommy EVER!!! Mama I love you! Daddy you're my best friend.
Those are the moments I live for. Those are the moments that still catch me off guard and take my breath away. Those are the moments that have made the past 7 months worth every worry, every tear, every home visit, personal questions, and court date.
Every morning when I walk in the girls room and my baby girl says "ga morming mommy!" lol It still makes me smile. When she facetimes with her daddy or her "mawmaw" (supposed to be grandma but whatever works lol) and she says "kisses" and kisses the phone or actually takes the phone and hugs it. I have to swallow a big lump every time.
They love their "Ashy" (my sister) and adore Khaunor and Carlisle. The girls get plum giddy around their granddad and they squeal with delight at the sight of my mom or Jake's mom "Gigi" They've named Jake's brother "Uncle Cookie Monster" and I don't think I've ever seen him smile as much as he has since they came into our lives. Even Jake's somber old man (Gramps) smiles now. They bring out the best in everyone. And those of you that have run into us or seen us out and about can see why. They are so warm and loving. They are little rays of sunshine. And they are ours...
Effective Tuesday, we will be assigned an adoption worker and we are hoping for that to be finalized by mid November. We are past all the red tape. We are just waiting on the required amount of time to pass so that we can get our court date. I can't wait to share their precious faces with you all. I can't wait to introduce our miracles to all of you who have followed us and prayed with and for us through all of this. I am so humbled by your support and your joy for us.
Hey y'all....I'm a mommy :)
Praise The Lord for He is GOOD. He gave us EXACTLY what we needed.
Love,
Lori
aka Mommy of 3 <3
Mommy I wanna rock! I want my blankie. Cup!
"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine...Twinkle twinkle little star....Jesus loves me....Rockabye baby" Sweet Dreams Princess I love you
Mommy! Kiss me on the lips!
Mama do you mind if I watch a little TV? Mama, I love you. I just wanted to tell you that and give you a hug
`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
That's just a little synopsis of what one of my days look like now.
And I couldn't possibly be happier.
We have a 4 year old son, an almost 3 year old daughter and an almost 2 year old baby girl.
They are absolutely perfect in every possible way.
We sing, we dance, we sit in the corner sometimes...we laugh, we cry, but most of all....
WE LOVE.
"I love you Mama" never gets old.
Mommy I WUV YOU! Daddy I WUV YOU! You're my best Mommy EVER!!! Mama I love you! Daddy you're my best friend.
Those are the moments I live for. Those are the moments that still catch me off guard and take my breath away. Those are the moments that have made the past 7 months worth every worry, every tear, every home visit, personal questions, and court date.
Every morning when I walk in the girls room and my baby girl says "ga morming mommy!" lol It still makes me smile. When she facetimes with her daddy or her "mawmaw" (supposed to be grandma but whatever works lol) and she says "kisses" and kisses the phone or actually takes the phone and hugs it. I have to swallow a big lump every time.
They love their "Ashy" (my sister) and adore Khaunor and Carlisle. The girls get plum giddy around their granddad and they squeal with delight at the sight of my mom or Jake's mom "Gigi" They've named Jake's brother "Uncle Cookie Monster" and I don't think I've ever seen him smile as much as he has since they came into our lives. Even Jake's somber old man (Gramps) smiles now. They bring out the best in everyone. And those of you that have run into us or seen us out and about can see why. They are so warm and loving. They are little rays of sunshine. And they are ours...
Effective Tuesday, we will be assigned an adoption worker and we are hoping for that to be finalized by mid November. We are past all the red tape. We are just waiting on the required amount of time to pass so that we can get our court date. I can't wait to share their precious faces with you all. I can't wait to introduce our miracles to all of you who have followed us and prayed with and for us through all of this. I am so humbled by your support and your joy for us.
Hey y'all....I'm a mommy :)
Praise The Lord for He is GOOD. He gave us EXACTLY what we needed.
Love,
Lori
aka Mommy of 3 <3
Friday, February 20, 2015
A Thousand Years
The other morning it hit me....this is really happening. We have prayed for this and this is really happening. I just went to my knees crying. I know now all the why's and when's and how could you's were all leading to THIS.
The words to this song are perfect for the way I feel....but first this quote.
"Not flesh of my flesh, nor bone of my bone,But still miraculously my own
Never forget for a single minute, you didn't grow under my heart
but IN it."
Now, here's the song I'm speaking of...the words fit perfectly....it's a love song to our children. They just have no idea how much I love them already. I've loved them for a thousand years...and I'll love them for a thousand more....
"And so it was that she, having waited long and endured patiently, realized and obtained what God had promised." Hebrews 6:15
<3 Lori
Soon-to-be mommy of 3
Monday, January 12, 2015
2015
This year will not revolve around our infertility. In fact, we are taking a break from all of it. Gosh that feels good to say...I feel like I should say something along the lines of "Hi my name is Lori and I'm addicted to fertility treatments" Blah. That's not funny but I think in a way it was true. Not the medication...by any means. But, I was so focused on the goal that I forgot why.
In the process, I've nearly had a nervous breakdown.
So, my husband and I are having fun. We are planning vacations. We are working on our home. We are watching movies in our pjs in front of a fire. We aren't going to Saturday appointments and running spending money on fertility stuff. I am not choking down pills every night and running to the potty every 5 minutes.
So...this is what being normal feels like? I like this. A LOT.
Don't get me wrong. We still want kids. And we will have kids. We may adopt. We are considering foster to adopt. We are considering lots of things.
But not until we have had a good long hiatus to just be us.
Thank you for your prayers and support. Please don't stop as my mental and emotional health isn't at it's best right now...but I am getting help for that so no worries ;)
Here's to a year of endless possibilities.
Love,
Lori
In the process, I've nearly had a nervous breakdown.
So, my husband and I are having fun. We are planning vacations. We are working on our home. We are watching movies in our pjs in front of a fire. We aren't going to Saturday appointments and running spending money on fertility stuff. I am not choking down pills every night and running to the potty every 5 minutes.
So...this is what being normal feels like? I like this. A LOT.
Don't get me wrong. We still want kids. And we will have kids. We may adopt. We are considering foster to adopt. We are considering lots of things.
But not until we have had a good long hiatus to just be us.
Thank you for your prayers and support. Please don't stop as my mental and emotional health isn't at it's best right now...but I am getting help for that so no worries ;)
Here's to a year of endless possibilities.
Love,
Lori
Monday, November 24, 2014
Thank you
It's still so strange to me to be able to say, "We are going through IVF right now." I am used to saying, "We are trying to have a baby" or "We are going through fertility treatments" but....IVF?!?! It always seemed so unattainable. The cost...it was just so much.
Nothing is ever too much for God.
Man, has He shown me that over the past few months. I still go back to that day that the nurse called me to tell me my pregnancy test was negative. It was our 4th failed IUI. I remember her saying that we were out of options and that we needed to move forward. I remember the room spinning and me crying and Jacob holding me and me crying some more. I will never forget that moment. I completely gave up. I completely let go. I knew that I had to because I had tried everything on my own. And it wasn't working. (duh) ;)
In less than 3 months, through fundraisers, donations, garage sales, auctions, personal savings, and selling unneeded items, we raised enough to pay cash for our treatment and our medication. We are not in debt. We did not have to take out any loans or anything.
That's big, y'all. Really big. But, I shouldn't have expected anything less. We serve a big God who loves us BIG. He wants to bless us BIG and He has.
There's no amount of thanks that I can voice to show what is on my heart. There are no words that are good enough to be able to express how thankful I am to all of you for being His hands on Earth. But I will try.
Thank you. From the bottom of our hearts, thank you for loving us enough to help us. Whether you dropped off items to sell, bought from the sales, donated money, bought t-shirts or bracelets, dropped change in the bottles, filled bottles, participated in the auctions, donated items to be auctioned, hosted parties and donated commission, PRAYED for us, ordered cakes or cupcakes, (I hope I'm not forgetting anything-if I am, I'm sorry!), YOU are a part of this journey. You are special to us and we love you all. We will never ever forget your generosity and thoughtfulness. Ever.
We are in the first days of the meds for ovulation. These are two shots twice a day in my tummy. They don't hurt. And it really wouldn't matter anyway. Like someone told me, "By the time I got to that point, I would have sawed my arm off to become a mommy" I feel the same way. Believe me.
Yesterday while talking to my best friend, we were laughing about something coming up in a couple of months and I said "Well, I'll be pregnant so it will just depend on that." We both kind of giggled and I said, "Isn't that funny how I said that?! But, you know, I just refuse to accept that this isn't going to work because I know it is. Not because of me, but because of God." And, that's exactly how I feel. This is it. I won't allow myself to have any doubts, because that's not Faith. Faith is believing. And I believe.
I ask that you please join us in fervent prayer that the medications we are taking now will do their job and produce lots of good quality eggs. And, then on December 4 (unless that changes) that we will have a smooth retrieval. I will be posting on facebook when we know the date of the embryo transfer. That day, we will need you all to pray constantly for a good transfer and successful implantation.
We love you.
Baby McAdams is coming. I just know it.
<3
Lori
Nothing is ever too much for God.
Man, has He shown me that over the past few months. I still go back to that day that the nurse called me to tell me my pregnancy test was negative. It was our 4th failed IUI. I remember her saying that we were out of options and that we needed to move forward. I remember the room spinning and me crying and Jacob holding me and me crying some more. I will never forget that moment. I completely gave up. I completely let go. I knew that I had to because I had tried everything on my own. And it wasn't working. (duh) ;)
In less than 3 months, through fundraisers, donations, garage sales, auctions, personal savings, and selling unneeded items, we raised enough to pay cash for our treatment and our medication. We are not in debt. We did not have to take out any loans or anything.
That's big, y'all. Really big. But, I shouldn't have expected anything less. We serve a big God who loves us BIG. He wants to bless us BIG and He has.
There's no amount of thanks that I can voice to show what is on my heart. There are no words that are good enough to be able to express how thankful I am to all of you for being His hands on Earth. But I will try.
Thank you. From the bottom of our hearts, thank you for loving us enough to help us. Whether you dropped off items to sell, bought from the sales, donated money, bought t-shirts or bracelets, dropped change in the bottles, filled bottles, participated in the auctions, donated items to be auctioned, hosted parties and donated commission, PRAYED for us, ordered cakes or cupcakes, (I hope I'm not forgetting anything-if I am, I'm sorry!), YOU are a part of this journey. You are special to us and we love you all. We will never ever forget your generosity and thoughtfulness. Ever.
We are in the first days of the meds for ovulation. These are two shots twice a day in my tummy. They don't hurt. And it really wouldn't matter anyway. Like someone told me, "By the time I got to that point, I would have sawed my arm off to become a mommy" I feel the same way. Believe me.
Yesterday while talking to my best friend, we were laughing about something coming up in a couple of months and I said "Well, I'll be pregnant so it will just depend on that." We both kind of giggled and I said, "Isn't that funny how I said that?! But, you know, I just refuse to accept that this isn't going to work because I know it is. Not because of me, but because of God." And, that's exactly how I feel. This is it. I won't allow myself to have any doubts, because that's not Faith. Faith is believing. And I believe.
I ask that you please join us in fervent prayer that the medications we are taking now will do their job and produce lots of good quality eggs. And, then on December 4 (unless that changes) that we will have a smooth retrieval. I will be posting on facebook when we know the date of the embryo transfer. That day, we will need you all to pray constantly for a good transfer and successful implantation.
We love you.
Baby McAdams is coming. I just know it.
<3
Lori
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